Pretty Lies is a song about my struggle with commitment in a relationship and not being able to allow myself to trust fully because of fear, a previous relationship or whatever the case maybe. it's a mystery but i always appreciate the metaphor my therapist gave me. it's like a circle right ? and your partner is completely standing in that circle. meanwhile you have one foot in and one foot out. you wanna stand in the circle too but there's something there that's holding you back from being able to love them to your fullest potential. it's something I'm working on and still searching for the answers on how to overcome. 

The process of this song all started February 18th 2025 when i was looking through jolst's beatstars profile, i believe i was looking for dark trap beats and stumbled upon a goldmine of more upbeat bouncier beats he had made. i wasn't aware he made beats in that genre of music but it's a genre/style i've been wanting to get into for awhile now so right away a song started coming together. Within the week i had a song fully structured, written and recorded. it wasn't until the next month i was able to send it to my engineer and friend, Nicolas Sales. April 10th we finally landed on a final mix, it was just mixing the higher pitch more melodic vocals you hear in what will be the released version. I ended up having to put my last set of vocals on the song after kennedyxoxo got his verse on it because i actually sent it to him right before he was going on the 2nd leg of his tour with guardin! he had just finished the 1st part of their tour on the east coast and with a couple weeks between the east coast and west coast tour he was able to get his verse finished for my song. I knew from the jump i wanted kennedyxoxo on this song and the fact we were able to make it happen feels incredible to me. as an artist who has been inspired by him and his sound ever since discovering him from a show he did with guardin back in December 2024 in Allentown PA it felt like a full circle moment.

It also feels really special that my friend and long time twitch viewer Kylie was a big fan of him and tried to introduce me to his music way before the show in Allentown. At first listen i wasn't a fan but something about seeing him perform his songs live, it grew on me. Kylie wanted to go to that show and unfortunately her life ended that same week. Me and Joan think about her often and i wish she could've been here to hear this song, she would have absolutely loved it but i'm glad this is a song fans have specifically asked for and i'm excited to finally start rolling some singles out before the year is up ! 

if you wanna keep up with me and future releases be sure to follow me on Instagram, i will be releasing new songs every 2-3 weeks and allowing my followers to VOTE between 2 songs. the song with the most votes wins (don't kill my spirit vs pretty lies) pretty lies wins.